Cheating in dating

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Clearly there's a wide divide between "watching porn is cheating" and "nothing except PIV is cheating." So to bring some clarity to the issue, here is how eight experts experts define cheating."In a time when people are really experimenting with what is/isn't a relationship and commitment, I understand why this can feel like a gray area.

My general litmus test for couples is to 'behave in my absence as you would in my presence.' That is far from perfect but I think it can help avoid a LOT of problems.

Gary Brown, a dating and relationship therapist in Los Angeles, tells Bustle. In that case, having PIV sex would be considered cheating.

On the other end, there are couples who have agreements about outside sexual contact that view breaking those agreements as cheating.

That does, however, mean having conversations about what that looks like to each person. What is important to understand is that once trust is broken, repairing and mending varies greatly from couple to couple and individual-to-individual.

When this is done, the transgression is very clear." - Jennifer B. Depending on a person’s history of trust issues, betrayals, attachment style and security, it may take one episode of a betrayal to dissolve the relationship.

Cheating can be physical, emotional and/or digital.

Focusing on investing energy in your relationship by creating a safe and loving space is the answer to prevent an emotionally fragile environment through which cheating can blossom." — Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin, LCPC, Certified Imago Relationship Therapist, and co-founder of The Marriage Restoration Project"[Cheating is] to be emotionally or physically unfaithful.To me, as a “senior” citizen, cheating means to me that someone had sex with another person while they were in a mutually committed relationship with someone. Some people can be very possessive, even when not in an “exclusive” relationship.There is no “sort of cheated” or “almost cheated” when this happens. They see someone having a cup of coffee with a co-worker, perhaps danced a dance with someone at a school function or went jogging with a member of the opposite sex.Each individual has additional idiosyncratic ideas about cheating and it becomes the partner's obligation to honor the boundaries set forth by the other." — Gregory Kushnick, Psy. D., Manhattan Psychologist Hopefully this helped you figure out your own boundaries when it comes to cheating because, really, that's what's important.

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